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Three gestational surrogates share their experiences as a surrogate mother

In recent years, gestational surrogacy has made healthy pregnancy possible for many parents who were not able to carry a child on their own. Using a surrogate allows intended parents to welcome a child into the world who is biologically connected to them. It’s an incredible thing. But have you ever wondered, “How does it feel to be a surrogate mother?” At Newborn Advantage, we work with gestational surrogates every day—so we asked a few of them to share what it’s like to be a surrogate. Here are their stories.

Jasmin C.

Jasmin had four healthy children of her own when she decided to become a gestational surrogate. She has since carried two children for other families, as a Newborn Advantage Surrogate. The first child she delivered was born on July 4, 2017.

“It was so special,” she remembers. “Both dads were there, and their reaction, seeing their baby for the first time, made it all worth it.”

Jasmin admits that pregnancy isn’t her favorite part of surrogacy, although she’s used to the aches and pains of carrying a child by now. “My favorite part is the delivery,” she says. “Seeing what my body is able to do is amazing.”

She also enjoys the friendships that are formed with the families she works with. Both couples send letters, thank you notes and photos of their children.

Many parents wonder if it’s hard for surrogates to give the child they carried back to its parents. But for Jasmine, it isn’t difficult at all.

“It’s not like I’m giving my baby up. It is their baby,” she says. “The doctor transferred it to me nine months ago, and now I am just giving it back.” The explanation makes sense, because gestational surrogates are not genetically related to the children they carry—although the child is genetically related to one or both of its intended parents. “It just feels like a friend’s baby,” Jasmin says.

For Jasmin, working with Newborn Advantage has been smooth and easy, and she recommends that anyone considering surrogacy should also consider working with a surrogacy agency.

“Newborn Advantage covered my medical and travel expenses, booked hotels for me, arranged rental cars, helped me with my health insurance, and handled the financial aspects, too. It was a very good experience,” she said. “If you have any questions or worries about the process, they take the time to answer your questions and ease your concerns—and there is never any pressure.”

Christina G.

Christina has three children, and is currently pregnant—but the baby she’s carrying is not her own. She has been a surrogate mother for four couples with Newborn Advantage, helping families all over the world—in Switzerland, India, New York, and now, London. Like Jasmin, she appreciates the friendships she has gained.

“Mindy does a really good job of matching personalities. That is definitely a trait she has that is second to none,” Christina said. “I have formed friendships with all four of the couples I have been paired with. In fact, with my first couple, I got more attached to the family, than to the baby I was carrying for them.”

Christina enjoys getting to know the couple she is helping, and sharing in their joy and tears throughout the process­—over the months leading up to a pregnancy, during the pregnancy itself, and even after the birth of a child.

“Turning a baby over to the parents for the first time, it is in that moment that you feel complete—happy, whole, and overjoyed for them,” she says

Giving to others comes naturally to Christina, who, in addition to being a gestational surrogate, is also a volunteer firefighter and a career EMT.

“I have three beautiful children myself, and surrogacy is a little something of me that I can give to other women who have struggled to become pregnant,” she says. “People often say, ‘I could never be a surrogate,’ or, ‘I couldn’t be firefighter or an EMT, and run into a burning building.’ Well, I can. I can do it, I choose to do it, and it completes my soul being able to give that part of me to people who can’t or are unable to.”

Olivia C.

Olivia recently completed her first-ever surrogacy experience with Newborn Advantage.

“They helped make the experience so enjoyable,” she said. “Everything was done in a timely manner. Doctor bills were always paid quickly, if I needed flights or hotels it was always done promptly, and compensation was always on time.”

Surrogacy is very personal, and communication is important throughout the journey.

“They were always checking up on me and asking how I was doing and feeling,” Cappel said. “I didn’t feel like I was just another client to them; they made me feel appreciated.” 

Surrogates Make it Possible

Newborn Advantage would not exist without surrogates—and we are very grateful to each one who works with our agency.

“I have had the privilege and honor of working with such fabulous, selfless women over the past 14 years,” said Mindy Berkson, Surrogacy Consultant at Newborn Advantage. “I am consistently impressed with their morals, values, ethics, the genuine hearts that bring them to surrogacy, and the gift they give to make others so happy.”

Where can I find a surrogate?

Considering using a surrogate mother? Contact Newborn Advantage today to work with the highest quality surrogates in the industry.  We look forward to hearing from you.

When you dream about welcoming a new baby into your family, you probably imagine joyful newborn snuggles in the beautiful nursery you spent months decorating—not stressful months waiting in a Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU), until your baby is healthy enough to bring home. If you’re considering gestational surrogacy using in vitro fertilization (IVF), one easy way to reduce risks of premature labor, birth defects and developmental problems is to follow the American Society for Reproductive Medicine (ASRM)’s recommendation of transferring only one embryo. While these risks are present with every pregnancy, they are significantly higher with multiples.

To learn more about why single embryo transfer is now the recommended approach for all patients below the age of 37, we spoke with Sinem Karipcin, MD, FACOG, Board Certified Fertility Specialist at Conceptions Florida Center for Fertility and Genetics.

“When there is a transfer of multiple embryos, the risks are increased in virtually every pregnancy complication across the board, including preterm labor, C-section delivery, pregnancy hypertension, gestational diabetes and blood clots,” Dr. Karipcin said. “When using a gestational surrogate, transferring more than one embryo at a time puts the surrogate at risk of having all these complications. But also, it increases risks for the children.”

In the United States, the preterm delivery rate in twins is 59 percent before 37 completed weeks of gestation and 11 percent before 32 completed weeks. Preterm infants may have cerebral palsy, resulting in intellectual or developmental disability, underdeveloped lungs, which can cause respiratory problems, or an underdeveloped digestive system, which can cause gastrointestinal problems.

“Fortunately, most of these children will recover from health problems associated with preterm labor, thanks to current technology—but there are certainly children who suffer as a result,” Dr. Karipcin explained. “There are financial consequences as well. Parents could end up with huge hospital bills because of NICU stays or pregnancy complications with the surrogate.”

Especially, if the embryos are tested for chromosomal balance (pre-implantation genetic testing for aneuploidy), there is no excuse for transferring more than one embryo. BEST trial, published by Eric Forman in 2013, demonstrated the superiority of single embryo transfers. The study compared the transfer of a single chromosomally balanced embryo to the transfer of two untested embryos. The ongoing pregnancy rate was the same. However, the multiple pregnancy rate was 50% in the double embryo transfer group.

“In my clinic, when the source of the egg is a woman younger than 35, the ongoing pregnancy rate is higher than 60% with single embryo transfer, with or without aneuploidy testing,” Dr. Karipcin said. “When the young moms ask about the possibility of multiples with untested embryos, I tell them expect to 50%.”

Dr. Karipcin also notes that transferring two embryos does not necessarily mean two babies. An embryo could split and make an identical twin, so intended parents could end up with triplets—or even quadruplets.

While Dr. Karipcin is a strong advocate for single embryo transfer, she acknowledges that ultimately, the decision is up to patients. When patients request a transfer that is outside the ASRM guidelines, she refers them to a maternal fetal medicine specialist, who provides additional counseling about the risks of multiples. Most patients choose single embryo transfer when they return.

“If the goal is to have a live, healthy birth, let’s not lose sight of how to get there,” Dr. Karipcin said. “There are fewer complications for all parties when it is a singleton pregnancy.”

In addition to being an exceptional clinician, Dr. Karipcin has also led a number of original studies to optimize IVF protocols at Harvard and Cornell, and conducts ongoing research in the field of pre-implantation genetic testing.

Are you interested in gestational surrogacy?

Newborn Advantage partners with industry experts like Dr. Karipcin, and fertility centers like Conceptions Florida, across the country. Contact us today to find out more about gestational surrogacy.

An internationally recognized expert, Mindy was recently quoted in the Spanish-language publication Miercoles. Access an English translation here: Berkson_MiercolesArticle.

Mindy was asked to share her expertise with the readers of Circle+Bloom. Read her expert tips for a successful fertility journey.

Link: Three Expert Tips

Mindy Berkson spoke to journalist Nicole Villalpando of the Austin-American Statesman and Raising Austin about finding a surrogate, egg donation and the journey to parenthood.

Link: My Statesman

Mindy Berkson was invited to sit down with a reporter from the Winnetka Talk, of the Pioneer Press newspapers, which is now a part of the Chicago Tribune,  to discuss the growth and success of her business, which is celebrating its 10^th anniversary this year. Did you know that the Lotus Blossom Consulting team of infertility consultants is responsible for the birth of close to 700 babies?

Link: Winnetka Talk

Mindy is quoted in an article on women in their thirties and forties who are struggling with infertility— which is why more young, single women are freezing their eggs.

Link: The Washingtonian

Mindy is profiled as “Woman of the Week” in Women’s Post Toronto.

Link: Post Toronto